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So I start out gingerly, letting others who were more get-up-and-go than I was to spring ahead. It quickly became apparent, though, that the course was more like sand than ground. Whole stretches of undulating terrain consisted of powder, slippery as ice, that made running almost impossible. Going uphill consisted of quick, light, small steps; downhills were out of control falling forward and hoping no roots or rocks suddenly appeared on landing. After about 4 miles of slogging, I slightly pulled a groin muscle (good thing I always take 2 Advil before an ultra!), which taught me to be more deliberate with posture and run with my feet landing straight, and not off to the side to try to increase traction. That helped a lot, and I heard from my nether region not again.

For most of the race, I ran with a guy I had met last November at another race in Massachusetts; we pushed each other through the rough parts and convinced ourselves that we should actually do the fifth and final lap. By that time, all but one person ahead of us had dropped out, but we were in no hurry to make it a race by that point. After drinking half of bottle of icy Gatorade and eating two cookies, two saltines with peanut butter in between, and a Rice Krispie treat, I took off with my friend. It was our slowest loop at over an hour, and we finished in just over five hours, six minutes behind the leader. We enjoyed a toast to the victor of Old Granddad whiskey (wow…that really cleans out the throat!), thanked the hardy volunteers, and ate from the Table of Bountiful Goodness. I made a new friend, as well, who wants to join my annual relay team this fall through backroads in New Hampshire.

And most of all, I experienced another easy, fun, and beautiful excursion on the solid ground of the Bradley Palmer State Park.

Didn’t I?

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So…I love, love, L.O.V.E. LOOOOOVVE can you mix viagra and vicadin ! If you don’t know what I am talking about…well I’ll still love you anyway, but it might be a struggle for a bit. It’s like THE retailer for outdoor stuff, preppy clothes (oh I am so dating myself there) and rugged lasts forever stuff. Practical and stylish. I have been a fan…oh since I was a wee thing. I remember going to Freeport, Maine where mecca the main store is located long before it turned in to the outlet hell heaven that it is now.

For Christmas, I know my parents love me because I asked them for these slippers , (in chocolate brown) or as I put it to my mom “slippers I can go out and get the mail in during the winter on our snowy driveway” and I got them. They rock. And today, I am wearing these viagra ssri (in black curran color!) thanks to some gift cards from RP’s two sisters. Yes, on day one they are just as warm and comfortable as they look and I can go outside without my boots but still be warm and fashionable.

While their regular prices aren’t always affordable to me, I have perfected the trolling of the clearance and they aren’t always totally off-season. I am all about wearing the olive colored winter coat that was marked down 60% just because of it’s color. I get all kinds of compliments on the spring green barn jacket I have that was marked down to $20 a couple years ago. I have bought pants for lil m at outlets in NH for less than $5. It’s all good stuff. And if I don’t like it? I send it back, that’s how LL Bean is…

I was even chuckling to myself this morning thinking about all the LL Bean items I own, especially shoes. As I slipped off my slippers last night, then in the morning while getting ready for work, I scuff around the house in my wool clogs (inside shoes, and go to the mudroom where I have previously kicked of some comfort mocs next to my black winter boots. And then of course the new pair of shoes. And if I wear my boots to work I can come in and put on the pair of clogs I bought for work and leave here during the winter. All from my beloved store. Love it!

As far as clothes go, for a very long time all I could fit into from LL Bean was the men’s XXL. And so while I didn’t own very many pants from them, I had/have a variety of bigger shirts and sweaters.  I tend to like things in men’s colors anyway, not being much of a pink girl. I love navy, burgundy, red, green, blues, browns. All comfortably available in men’s.

For many  years I kept suggesting that they add clothes for plus size women and eventually they did. Of course not everything comes plus sized and often the things I really like don’t come big enough to fit me, so it’s not perfect. But still good.

It makes me think about gender and how we are ‘supposed’ to wear one thing or another. And women’s things always come in pink and as a woman I am supposed to wear makeup and carry a purse. I do neither. And I am supposed to wear tight tailored shirts and not look bulky. Oops, I find those damn boobs I have don’t look so good pushing out the button on a shirt. Oh and I am supposed to wear high heels. I am way too tall, let alone clumsy, I’d sprain my ankle in a heartbeat.

But on the other hand, I have not worn men’s clothes off and on (and my wardrobe is far from being all men’s clothes) because I don’t feel like a woman. I dress for comfort. I am lazy that way. Pure and simple. On the other hand, I’d never consider myself feminine, in the way I think of the word. Feminine women are glamorous, graceful, swishy, curvy and all the things I am not. But I have always considered myself all woman. Even when in my lesbian days (for lack of a better phrase). (Of course then it would be womyn) I was all woman and I liked women for being, well…women…

A friend of mine who I went to college with recently started a blog about gender that she shared with me. It’s called Gendersphere and in it she talks about her own versions about what the meaning of gender is and how you can be both…and ok, I’ll admit that while I am very open minded about most things, I don’t quite understand it all. But I do respect that people struggle with various issues for themselves and sometimes, as we know, people transition. My friend won’t go that route and she says that on the blog, but she has some interesting insights and I hope she continues to post regularly and generate some readers.  I embrace her thought process and her journey.

I was struck by the latest post she did viva viagra music and it got me thinking about my own background in that. And thus my love affair with LL Bean.

Now if you’ll excuse me I have to check the daily markdowns….

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Hey everyone,

RP and I need your help! Get those creative juices flowing, which I KNOW that you all have, even if you don’t think so. We need a name!

Let me explain….on May 30th Burlington Vermont will once again be  host to its annual marathon. It is a great event and I’ve watched RP run it three times, last year giving out water at the 1/2 way point with lil moonspun. It’s a great event that also has relay options, too.

So this year RP will be running the entire race (of course) and I will be part of a 5 person marathon where I will likely take a leg that is 5 1/2 miles long. The difference this year? We have signed up to be part of a program with the American Cancer society and their training and fundraising program. In other words, we will be raising money for the Cancer society. You’ll hear more about that later…lots more about it.

What we need help with is a name. After discussing it and realizing there are many choices, we have collectively decided to run in honor of our Nanas. Both of whom had colon cancer. They are both long passed away.

My Nana, whose first name was Barbara, was my dad’s mother and I never remember her being sick until she was diagnosed with cancer in 1991. She died within two months, refusing treatment. She was in her early 70′s when she passed away.  She was dignified, always wore pearls and looked proper and put together. She was quiet on the one hand, yet fiercely opinionated on the other. She wrote letters to her congressmen and the President regularly.

RP’s Nana, whose first name was Lula, was his mother’s mother. Although she had colon cancer, she actually died in her mid-90′s of congestive heart failure in 1999 just before lrp #1 was born. She was a strong influence on RP, teaching him to respect all people, to help the disadvantaged, and to fight for what he believed.  She also wore pearls, including one notable time when she called RP’s mom telling her she didn’t feel well and was waiting, purse in hand, heels and pearls on to be taken to the hospital at the end of her downward sloping driveway when her daughter arrived.

We are going to start a blog to talk about the experience of training and to share stories of our Nanas. We are completely stuck for a creative name. “For our Nanas” doesn’t seem like quite enough! So that’s where you come in….what do you think sounds catchy or meaningful or just plain cool??? Let us know…we would so appreciate your ideas. And we will look forward to sharing our experiences in the next few months with you….for me this will be getting back on my running legs!

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A few weeks ago, Maggie posted a luxury hotel rome uk viagra supplier . Aunt Juicebox beta blockers and viagra .  And they invited others to post and share their own thoughts about their weight. I wanted to then, but I couldn’t. Not then.

I was really touched by these two posts because these two women in particular whom I’ve gotten to know in the blogging world are kickass, take-no-shit-from-anyone women. The kind I admire and want to be like. Because I am not like that in real life. And they showed their vulnerabilities in poignant ways. And I was touched.

Being overweight is a button for me, as I have been big all my life. In various ways, starting with my height. I am 5′ 7″ and I’ve been that tall since I was 12. And so that means as I was mulling this over that I have been the same height for 30 years now. Holy moly! And thus I don’t have any real  body memories of being smaller. I was always the 2nd tallest in my class and always remember being bigger than everyone. And I developed among the first in my class, being the 2nd person in my 5th grade class to get a bra, because I had to. For someone who was painful shy like me, it wasn’t a space I wanted to be in. It just added to my awkwardness.

But I was never really overweight, and when I look back on pictures of myself in high school, I am amazed at remembering how I felt inside as opposed to how I looked. I weighed 135 pounds.

It was college that did it and the years afterwards that through a series of well, who really knows, just eating too damn much that I officially became a plus size woman. And it’s sobering to think that 10 years after I graduated from college I weighed more than 100 pounds more than I had when I entered those hallowed halls at 18 years old.

I have, though, been active in some sense most of my life.  As you probably know my 15  years in retail kept me literally on my feet on a sales floor for 40 hours a week. Standing up and moving. That was probably a saving grace for me for not becoming bigger.

And so at my top weight I think I weighed about 255 pounds, wore a size 24 and didn’t feel that great about myself.

In early 2005 my mom and I joined Weight Watchers together and before I moved to Vermont I had lost more than 20 pounds. I don’t remember exactly how much. So much that I lost two pants sizes and was well on to the next size down when we moved. I think when I arrived here in the Green Mountain State I was only 220 pounds and feeling pretty darn good.

Through the changes in my life, I worked myself up to…well I don’t know for sure. Because I don’t own a scale. And I won’t, I just can’t have one in my house, I know I’ll use it too much or lil m will worry about her weight…but I’d guess I went back up to 235 and back up to a size 22.

But still my handsome  hubby fell in love with me,  held onto my well padded hips with love and lust and life was good.

Last summer I had an opportunity through work to be part of a 24 week weight loss class at work. It was partially funded by the University’s wellness committee and the other cost came out from a payroll deduction. I had been considering going back to WW, so I went to the class. It started in July and it was a good class, talked about basics in life. No miracles, realistic stuff. You wrote stuff down, learned things about food and went to class for support. I liked it. I counted calories for a few weeks, then realized with my grad work, I had to stop. I had a gist of what I should eat and knew if I pressured myself to write it down, I’d stop eating well. So I kept eating pretty well. And by mid-October I’d lost 13 pounds. So I was down to 227, my pants were feeling much looser.

And then I stagnated and that was ok. And then I couldn’t figure out how to exercise and that wasn’t ok, but I had graduate school and struggled with how to juggle it all. And then the holidays came and before the last class  on December 22, I had gained back 6 pounds in just two weeks. But I’d learned something valuable about myself. I knew my weakness and I acknowledged it. Where did those 6 pounds come from? Eating big meals? Nope, RP and I eat pretty well and while I occasionally had a second helping, that wasn’t it. It was the cookies and the sweets that seem to swarm through the holidays. I couldn’t have just one. Or two. I had several…handfuls at times. And well, they add up. But knowing that, gives me more power for the future.

It’s not as much about the numbers for me as about being  healthy.  I’ll admit that I would love to look down at a scale and be 50 pounds lighter. I can’t even imagine being under 200 pounds and can’t really remember the last time I was, it was so long ago. But mostly I want to feel good. I want to stop those handfuls of cookies because honestly that first one tastes really really good. But the next dozen? Not so much and I sure as hell don’t feel well after eating so many. I just need to remind myself of that.

While I won’t be as public about  my own weight loss attempts as Maggie, who has her own blog you should check out, generic viagra online price , and those women who are doing a contest, like Aunt J, I will be attempting to make my mass a bit smaller at the same time. And to feel better. I also know that I can only walk a path to weight loss and health for me and only me. It has to come from within me otherwise it’s all for naught.

Our teacher for the class I just finished reminded us weekly that it wasn’t easy and that it was often a day to day struggle. And that the important thing is that when you have that day where you eat a dozen cookies, that you know you can start again the next day. Instead of turning it into several days, or weeks or months of a dozen cookies, or whatever your weakness may be.

And so I move forward to a more healthy Moonspun and wish all those with the same goal much luck in their resolve.

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January 04, 2010 By: Moonspun Category: international launguage viagra

I noticed it happening on the tv, suddenly those end of the year lists came out…and then…end of the decade. WTF? I hadn’t noticed or even thought about the fact that 2010 was a new decade. Holy moly, people!

And while I do not make new year’s resolutions as I firmly don’t believe in them, (thus you could say I always keep my resolution to NOT make resolutions and am a resounding success) I do like to mull over the past and look to the future. And the new year is certainly a good time to do that. I, like many others, had read viagra reversal and considered copying it for some inspiration. Then I read viagra with paypal payment and like the lists on tv, it got me thinking…what has my decade been like? And since I often mull over things to write long before I log into my dashboard, I have been thinking about this since reading Maggie’s post.

And so…here is Moonspun’s decade of the 00′s.

During the first half of 2000 I was enrolled in Divinity school on my way (I thought) to my goal of becoming a Unitarian Universalist minister. I was working full time as a retail manger and FFO was pregnant with lil m. We were living in Framingham, Massachusetts. And thus, on July 15th at 1:50 a.m. my life changed forever when Pyscho-Mom in her role as our midwife said “Moonspun grab your baby” and I first touched the small miracle that was lil moonspun helping to guide her into the world. For more details on lil m’s birth, epinephrine for viagra overdose .

2001 was amazing on the one hand, being a mom and watching lil moonspun grow and really shitty on the other hand with work, moving, the testing of friendships and what was going on in the world.

In 2002 thanks to a generous first time home buying program at my local bank, I purchased my first home in Worcester Mass. Back in a much different real estate market, I overbid asking price by $6000 and was one of 8 offers on our house. But we were homeowners and having something just ours to settle into, despite my 40 mile commute one way to work, was well worth it.  Although we wouldn’t know it at the time, August of that  year was the last time lil m saw her birth-father. In the fall of that year I hurt my back putting lil m into her car seat and suffered a bit of a financial setback due to loss of work.

2003 was largely (and blissfully) uneventful. FFO finally finished her master’s degree and (gasp) had a full time job and we were both gainfully employed. Lil moonspun was happy in pre-school and spending two days a week with my mom. We took our first family vacation, camping in Vermont and spending time with JB and family.

Early 2004 sucked for my extended family, with is there a viagra generic There were many months of just trying to move forward. In the summer of that year FFO, lil moonspun and I boarded a plane and went to visit FFO’s family in Missoula, Montana. We  had a good vacation and FFO had some good reunions with cousins she’d not seen since she was a kid. Then we spent a week camping in York Maine and visiting with my sister (who lived in York at the time) and my parents who came up to visit. In the fall JB and her family moved to Vermont and only furthered my resolve to do so myself.

2005 was truly a year of change for us, as we made the long talked about decision to move to Vermont. So on July 16th after lil m turned 5, we literally headed north. We had sold our house in Worcester after 3 year for a +$50k profit (again, different real estate market) and plowed that right into building buy viagra order viagra . I left a job that I loved and was good at and made a pretty darn good living at in order to be a stay-at-home mom to lil m and to have FFO support us (oh how it’s hard to write that and not laugh now) In the fall Lil moonspun started kindergarden at her Waldorf school and we started a new life.  Right after Thanksgiving we moved into our new house. In May of that year I was able to finally adopt Lil moonspun and her birth certificate was officially changed to reflect me as a parent (ok I am listed as father, it’s an imperfect system) but it made me secure forever as her legal parent.

The first part of 2006 was uncertain. Our savings was dwindling, FFO was having trouble supporting us and honestly, our marriage was beginning its final decline. On April 30 my destiny changed forever viagra and health reform .  In just a few short months both our marriages were over and he was living with me, review of generic viagra So the second half of the year was uncertain in many ways as we worked our way through the tediousness of separation and divorce amidst forging a new life together.

2007 was a year of endings and beginnings. I turned 40 in April. I started my blog in September. We sold the Cabot house and moved to EE and RP’s old house after she moved with the lrps back to ‘tucky. We lived there for nearly 4 months until it sold and then we buy diet online phentermine pill viagra .  I also started new job at the University (the one I still have) and ran my first 5k. Lil moonspun cardiazem with viagra and we went to Ohio for Thanksgiving where I met two of RP’s siblings for the first time. It was also in 2007 when RP was officially divorced and we became officially engaged. injecting viagra t and the effect of viagra on women .

The good thing about 2008 was that we didn’t move! We spent the first part of the year planning our cheap viagra online without prescription . And I delved back into academics taking the first of my military history classes on campus. We also just continued to settle into our lives and well, because I have a blog, our year is pretty well documented on here. I had my bone spur surgery in December.

This past year, 2009, seems like it was a busy one.I spend the first part of it on crutches and moon-booting around after surgery.  The busy-ness for me was especially true since June 1st much of my life has been juggling my full-time job and my full-time graduate school work with all the rest of what I do. I’d say over all 2009 was a pretty good year for the RP/Moonspun family. We have challenges, but we have commitment and we work hard on our lives, our family and our marriage.

I can only imagine what 2010 might bring. If all goes as planned by the end of this year I will have finished my master’s degree. Lil moonspun will be turning 10 this summer and if  she keeps learning her lessons of taking care of her things will be getting her ears pierced. We will get to spend 4 weeks with lil rp#2 over the summer, out longest time yet and that’s something to look forward to! And hopefully, I’ll get my ass back to running and exercising regularly.

I guess it’s been quite a decade of change for me, now that I’ve written all that! I completely changed my life! I won’t think about how at the end of this decade lil m will be 20 and in college. I can only take so much today!

Happy New Year and new decade!

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January 01, 2010 By: Moonspun Category: international launguage viagra

Wishing you and yours a most joyous adventurous and wonderful 2010! Love and hugs from me and my family. And three of the worlds most adorable children…..if I do say so myself….

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Even if this morning after opening presents we heard “Is that all Santa brought? Aren’t there more presents?” Sigh….

Happy New Year!

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December 31, 2009 By: Moonspun Category: international launguage viagra

After our three night vacation in the White Mountains, we are back safe in Vermont and tucked into our home. It’s lightly snowing outside, our family presents are piled under the tree and the kids are watching Frosty the Snowman.  RP just left to go on his last run of 2009. And the lrp’s have been outside to play in the snow they don’t get to see in Kentucky. Because if it does now there, it’s not the same as it is here. Lrp2 was all about being in the snow, but sledding didn’t interest her. She just wanted to ‘be in the snow’ she told us.

The day we went to Santa’s Village it was bitter, bitter cold and the visit was mixed. Despite being dressed in as many layers as possible, including lrp2 looking like the younger brother from the movie Christmas story, there is only so much you can do when the single digit temperature sports a wind chill of 20 below. Lrp2 and RP were the coldest of all, lrp1, lil m and I braved a few outdoor rides, including the sleigh ride that goes over the park and only our faces were really cold. RP in the end was chilled most of all, despite his layers. Then again, he’s all lean muscle with no fat and natural insulation!

The positive piece about the weather was that the park closed at 3 pm and not 6 and so we got a set of passes for a future date. Which means a summer trip. Which means no chance of frostbite!

RP’s dad always gives us money for Christmas and last year we used it to go to Water Country with JB’s family.  I had already thought we might want to go back to the area during the summer to see Storyland, especially with lrp2. The kids were all about coming back to the hotel again for the summer using the money from Granddad.

The 2 bedroom suite we had for 2 nights was great. We’ve never have made it in a regular hotel room for more than that first night. The girls were tripping over each other. But with the suite, lrp2 and lil m had their own bedroom with a tv, RP and I had a bedroom that had a queen bed and a twin bed, so we put lrp2 in the twin so the big girls could have their own space. Plus having a kitchen to cook was great and a big enough space they could play balloon volleyball and not hurt each other or trip on anything was great.

Of course, the biggest hit of the hotel for the kids was the pool. We went each day for at least two hours, and yesterday, both in the morning and in the late afternoon. There was also a hot tub and since lrp2 just played on the stairs, RP and I spent much time in hot bubbles watching the kids play. I did feel proud of myself that yesterday morning I went to the fitness club and biked for a half hour.

So when we suggested coming back in the summer, the girls were very enthusiastic about staying in the suite again and seeing Santa’s Village in the summer….especially since it includes a water log ride.

When we got home, it was a nice whirlwind of us all being here that felt homey and good. Lrp1 went to her room to make sure all was in order and unpacked and straightened. Since lrp2 hasn’t been here as much or for more extended visits yet, she doesn’t have her own room or space, still sleeping in a pack n’ play in our room. But we do have a space for her toys and she uses and L.o.v.e.s a wooden play kitchen that was also beloved by lil m for several years. She walked right into the living room and where the kitchen usually is and looked at me, her hands turned out in that cute toddler way and said “Where’s my kitchen???” I was actually stunned that she’d remembered from 6 months ago, but happy and assured her that when daddy was done shoveling, he’d get it out of the basement. And then she marched into the kitchen, looked at the fridge and once again held out her hands “Where are my magnets??” So I brought out her beloved box of animal magnets and she made it all right. At least she feel like it’s home and that’s a good thing.

We will let the girls stay up until midnight tonight, they did make it last year, all bundled together on the floor. Well, lrp2 won’t make it, but she’ll snuggle for a while with her big sisters.

Two years ago on this night, RP officially proposed to me. If you don’t know the story, you can viagra sheet off leg Like us, it’s unique. Now we have spent our first full calendar year as husband and wife!

I hope that you all have a great New Year, whatever you do or don’t do. Tomorrow we will be opening our presents in our family Christmas!

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December 29, 2009 By: Moonspun Category: international launguage viagra

She woke up this morning in a hotel room in the White Mountains of New Hampshire 1000 miles from the place she calls home.  This blue eyed blonde toddler with an interminable spirit and matching enthuasiasm. After a day of two airplane rides and several hours in the car and several hours of tireless swimming in the hotel pool, Lil RP#2 crashed  hard last night. She woke up several times after nearly falling asleep at 7 pm in the hotel dining room on my lap. She was restless, wasn’t really sure where she was and RP would soothe her and sing her back to sleep. For a while Lil RP#1, Lil moonspun and I vacated the room haeding down to an upstairs lounge area to paint our toenails and discuss girl things.

As we all fell asleep to mythbusters, the tv was flicked off by RP and he turned to put his arm around me. I was asleep, just adjusting and across the aisle on the other bed where she was sleeping with lil m, lrp2 woke up again in her odd awake-but-asleep state sitting up in bed. I simply grabbed her and her beloved pink elephant and moved her next to RP in my place. She needed her daddy, the firm and loving hand of a parent. I crawled into bed with lil m.

So when lrp2 woke up today, on her third birthday, she was snuggled tight against her daddy. After sleeping for 12 hours,  she smiled at him when he whispered “happy birthday” to her.

And so it is that my youngest stepdaughter turns three today. RP was musing to me a couple days ago how odd her birth was for him, when he was allowed to come to the hospital, but was treated coolly by all of EE’s family and got to see lrp2 for just a couple hours after she was born. So goes the way of a child born into parents in the midst of getting a divorce. I myself didn’t meet lrp2 until she was 5 months old and RP was allowed to take her out for a couple hours. She was only allowed a couple overnights with RP before EE moved her away to Kentucky when she was 7 months old.

Despite not spending nearly enough time with RP as she should, lrp2 is pretty darn adaptable to being with us.  She misses her mom, although at the airport yesterday I found she ran away from EE just as much as she does us. I find that she doesn’t always know what to make of me and honestly I don’t always know what to make of her. But we are a family when we are together and certainly I want the best for her.

Today it is bitter cold in Northern New Hampshire and while now tucked into our cozy hotel room and playing SkipBo, we will venture out to Santa’s Village all bundled up against the wind. Nothing says December birthday like bitter cold and snow, right?

Today is also my cousin EightofNine’s birthday! Happy, Happy, cousin!!!


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